Coaching

The relationship between travelling and spirituality

To go inside ourselves and discover the nature of our soul. Letting go of life-experiences by accepting them for what they truly are. Speaking with our own voice and telling our own story. Like travelling, the spiritual process is a journey of discovery and adventure, of meeting people and saying goodbye. Sometimes we seem to take a wrong turn and end up somewhere else. But on the other hand; if you don’t know where you’re going, any road will get you there. All roads are important, eventually. There are no pre-designed paths to follow, there is no road map, and nothing happens without reason. We create our own, unique path. Let us enjoy and take pictures along the way.

So, becoming spiritualy aware is exactly like travelling. And the other way around… travelling is a spiritual experience, almost by definition. Therefore, eventually, travelling helps us on our spiritual path. As GOIN (being both a traveller and a spiritually aware being) I can help you on your path. From own experiences, and from several techniques, we will learn to understand your path and ask the right questions. It is up to you to answer them, I can only help you to formulate the right ones. In the spiritual part of my blog, I sometimes write about things that keep my mind busy. Maybe there’s inspiration for you there as well. Check out these “spiritual thoughts“.

Trauma transcends generations

“Modern times bring modern problems”… We face issues, questions, fears, and challenges our parents could never imagine. Our feelings may therefore seem strange to them, but they are just as real, even if they can’t understand. And there’s more… Our own lives don’t simply begin at birth and end with death, nor do our issues. The issues we don’t deal with in this life, will come back, again and again, until we do deal with them. People also deal with issues that are not their own, but were passed down within families from one generation to the next, whether as a copy of a previous generation’s behaviour, or as a mirror of it. Our parents couldn’t or didn’t dare to deal with the issue, and that’s okay. Now it’s up to us to decide if the trauma stops here, or if we pass it on to yet another generation.

Many people feel a profound uncomfort, and have a desire for purpose and rest in this fast-paced, unfair society. We see injustice around us, cruelty, and the corruption of western democracy. Politics and religion fail, while our earth is being exploited and destroyed by an elite. All to keep our unsustainable way of life. We look at others who have more… so they must be happier. If we too had more, we would be happy as well. But mankind has never been more enslaved than now! These chains are not made of iron, however… they are made of money and images. We work to live up to unrealistic and fake social expectations. “If we work hard, we will have it all!” But since we don’t have it all now, we must not be working hard enough. Nothing is ever enough. We are not enough. I am not enough…

And then... you start to wake up

From the moment we start to “wake up” from the mass dillusion, we see so many people deaf and blind to what is really happening. It makes us question if it’s us, that we are the ones ‘going crazy’ after all. The short answer to that question is: you are not. If you experience this, it is because you are sane in a profoundly sick society. It is called “awakening”, and I have bad news for you… it gets worse. But there is good news too! First of all; you are not alone. And second; this is your opportunity to really deal with trauma (yours and from previous generations). It is time for you to heal. And when you heal, you also the generations before you.

Personal experiences

I’ve always felt different, always had a feeling of not-belonging, but mostly of not-understanding. I tried to, I really tried to, but it frustrated me and made me feel even more an outsider. I remember skipping a class at school, and then being deeply disappointed when it turned out to still be boring. School was not about learning, it was about repeating. It didn’t make sense to me. I didn’t ‘feel’ it. Other things felt very strong (like music, nature, emotions). I couldn’t understand why others didn’t experience the same. Did they not hear and see the what I did?

I was aware I was annoying for others and I that I didn’t meet the expectations of adults. Having feelings as a boy was apparently really weird, for example. I just couldn’t understand “how the game was supposed to be played”. And when adults told me I was a difficult child, I became convinced there was something wrong with me. Believing that, was easier than fighting it. It explained why I didn’t deserve to be loved. So I wished I was ‘normal’, that I was average. Later, I tried to not stand out. Needless to say, that never worked.

It's not about doing the things right, it's about the right things

When I was in my late 30’s, I was still running in the same circles. I realized that if I kept doing the same thing, I would always end up with the same result. So, I needed to change something, I needed to wake up and change myself. Not because there was something wrong with me. Not because I was not doing my best, or doing things wrong. But because I was not doing what is right for me. I realized I was not giving myself the love that I needed all those years. And if I don’t give love to myself, how could I receive anyone elses love?

When I later found out I am a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), everything started to make sense. My history, how others responded to me, and how that made me feel about myself. I was different, I am different, and I’ll always be… and that is just beautiful! When I tried to be like other people, I was limited in who I was and what I could do. Now, I set my own limits. My sensitivity is not a curse, it’s a gift! As soon as I started to embrace my traits, in stead of fighting them, my life started to change. The pieces of the puzzle finally fell into place.

Travel to find out who you are meant to be

I strongly believe travelling helps you to find out who you are and what you want. A Dutch comedian once joked about spirituality. He said people try to find themselves in places they had never been before. As if they would just stumble upon themselves in the jungle, or behind a rock: “Oh, there you are you, I was looking for you!” It turns out he was more right than he realized. But we don’t want to find who we were. After all, that is the person we’re trying to leave behind. We want to find who we truly are, we want to become the person we were always meant to be. We won’t find that person in places where we’ve been, or we would have found ourselves already. And exactly for that reason we need to step out of our comfort zone and go somewhere else to do something different. 

Now, I’d love to take you across the world and travel through many countries, as a means of coaching. You would find yourself, and you’d come out stronger and more confident than ever… and I would too. But more realistically, we’re talking about coaching online. We use Skype, or another way of video calling, and when the time is right (and if necessary), I invite you to come to Cluj-Napoca for a more intense time of talking and working in an inspiring environment. From your B&B (or a hotel, if you prefer), we walk straight into the woods every day to ‘go to work’. I don’t have detailled packages to offer (yet). Every person and every situation (and every budget) calls for a different approach. Contact me when you are interested, and we’ll find a way that works best for both.